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The teams are in the pavilion scoffing their lunch. India started with losing Sehwag in the second over but have since looked pretty comfortable in getting to 51/1 on a good batting wicket. Prediction for the day: India end on 262/2 leaving England with a mountain to climb.

Vainikolo beating people up?

Allegedly in a fight 'outside a nightclub' (is that journalistic jargon for any fight after 5pm?) and charged with GBH.

A mixed up attempt to do a top 10 list from the Guardian blog...

But interesting in parts nonetheless... not least for awarding quote of the year to ""My England man put rampant rabbits to shame" - said by random NZ chick after the 'hotel incident' in Auckland.

A classic test match - but not really for England, who in the end were beaten by 6 wickets.

This is all very close stuff - a great chase from India - they're now on 274/4 chasing 387 to win.

England declare on 311/9 leaving India to chase a big 387 in just under 4 sessions. With the pitch cutting up it's a very big ask, but Sehwag is already cutting loose - he's on 22 after only 4 overs.

So now its my predictions that are in tatters. England running along relatively well. After a dismal start they're now 260/4 with Strauss just out for 108, Collingwood also getting his ton. Here comes Freddie... 'ave it.

So the rails are coming off a bit for England now. Having bowled India out for 241, and had a lead of over 100 before losing their first wicket, they're now at 43/3 with Pietersen and Bell going as cheap as gas lighters.

So far my prediction looking good...

India finish the day "In tatters" according to The Times of India. At 155/6 they're certainly in a bit of bother but it's England they're playing against and so long as they're asked to get no more than 200/250 on the last 2 days of this pitch then they have a good chance. I'd say India all out tomorrow for little over 200 with England finishing the day on 140/7. Lets see if that one comes true.

Perhaps, the most eventful first over in Test cricket:

1. Swann starts out being carted past point for 4.
2. Big shout for a catch on second ball
3. He traps Gambhir lbw with a marginal call but umpire Harper is convinced.
4. Tendulkar off the mark with 2 runs
5. Another single for Tendulkar
6. Dravid goes! Pitching outside off and moving in, Dravid misses with the bat and umpire Harper fully agrees with the England team.

Swann is first player in history to take 2 wickets in his first over. Lets see if he can keep it up after tea.

England all out for 316, with India now the slow scorers on 28/1, Sehwag falling for 9 in the 6th over. Freddie and Jimmy are up for it today throwing down some big stuff... some scary moments for Dravid with 10 minutes to tea.

England reach a very slow scoring 294/8 at lunch. Matt Prior getting to 39 and looking in good form... lets hope he can continue to push after lunch.

Daly watch: December

The big man had a bad day in the Australian Open today carding a 78 but providing great entertainment for the crowd by snatching a man's camera and smashing it against the nearest tree.

More on Warne 'The Musical'

Warney originally got upset at the thought of a musical - now he's appearing on stage endorsing it. How much of a cut of takings is he taking?

Cricket as a metaphor for foreign policy

The FT discusses why US foreign policy should be more like cricket than baseball. It must be holiday time soon if this is what they're filling the pages with.

Ok so today has finished in typical England style... a first day score of something around 200 with 5 wickets down. The only unusual thing was the way they got there... Strauss getting 123 and everybody else pitching with dross.

Ambrose dropped thank goodness, 2 spinners be interesting. Harmison to chuck a few pies as usual?

So England are to play the tests due to start tomorrow. I can't see England winning either, rain will probably gift us a draw in the first but after that I fear the worst. Selection of late -one dayers- has been mystifying to me so I'll be interested to see the XI who take to the field, not that it'll make much difference to the result.

Just when you thought musicals couldn't get any worse...

... comes Shane Warne the musical.

Roy Keane thrown out for poor George Best impersonation...

The pictures in this article say it all...

So England have a tough draw against heavyweight Argentina, Scotland and somebody like Spain, Romania, Uruguay etc. At least it's an easier start than the other home nations who face some much tougher starts:

Pool A: New Zealand, France, Tonga, Canada most likley, Japan most likely. Excellent prospect for group of death - only France can beat New Zealand in world cups prior to the final.

Pool B: Argentina, England, Scotland, likely Spain or Romania, random very poor team. On 2008 form is probably the most evenly matched group...

Pool C: Australia, Ireland, Italy, Spain or Romania, USA or Urguguay. Depends on the direction Ireland and Italy take the next 3 years... if it's a nose dive in the wrong direction this could be a walk-over for the Aussies.

Pool D:South Africa, Wales, Fiji, Tonga or Samoa, Namibia probably. Wales will likely fancy themselves in this group - perhaps to even take out the Springboks/Proteas/random animal/flower that they'll be known as in 2011.

So England go down 6-32 to the guys that do the funny dance. My only question is - was the lack of discipline (4 players sin binned) necessary to keep the score down or was it the main cause of the scoreline? Answers on a postcard please.

Another easy try for NZ. Carter chokes the extras again. Fortunately the baby is crying here and that means little more from me...

Easter's turn now - he dives into the ruck like Greg Louganis and is promptly penalised with Carter actually getting one this time. 6-20.

A certain try for New Zealand but they knock on with 3 vs 1 and 5 yards to go. That was crap and no. 4 is going to get a bollocking after this game. However England manage to lose their own scrum and New Zealand run it over in the opposite corner. Carter chokes the extras to keep the crowd in good cheer. 6-17 to New Zealand.

So England back at 15 players for the first time in over 30 minutes. However Kiwis very close to England line now and looking a little dangerous, but not very. The ref continues his closing down sale for penalties and this one is for England ... it moves them up field and attacking.

England yet again offside and the ref is having to blow up for penalties every 30s or so right now. Wasn't the idea of these ELVs to stop so many penalties? This is certainly chokable for Carter today (wide on right, but not far out) and... the crowd go mental as it just misses the right upright. Carter's misses are perhaps the only real highlight for the crowd so far today.

More argy bargy - this time New Zealand get the warning but alas not the card. Vickery taking the kick... no only joking. Delon 'the hero' Armitage takes a swipe and its right in the middle. He can really do no wrong (... apart from the ball he put out on the full in the first half perhaps).

Lots of slow mauling stuff from England - the Kiwis certainly don't like it since it's using up lots of time and slowing their game down to a crawl. This is a good tactic for England - pretty much all they can probably hope for right now. However you just can't see it working until the end of the game. Perhaps if they can hold out until their players are back on the pitch...

This is getting stupid now - Toby Flood off for a high tackle after England had camped on the NZ line for few minutes doing some old school standing mauls and drives. England are really in trouble without a reliable no. 10.

Quick half time summary: It's not pretty to watch but then again very little high end rugby is when sides are concerned about winning. England have almost had parity in many phases but are taking the ball stationary in the backs and the forwards are being punished for many errors and disciplinary issues. New Zealand haven't looked great with Carter missing plenty and even Scarlet being hauled over the coals a couple of times by the ref. That said it's more than likely that New Zealand will find a way to make the extra experience and fitness tell in the final 30 minutes.

More hands in the ruck from England and about the 20th penalty against them. Carter slots over from about halfway as the referee threatens to throw 4 more England plays in the sin bin. Half time can't come quickly enough now for England.

Scrums have become a bit of a joke - this one's been reset 4 times now and the referee 'thinks' he knows what's going on - and therefore awards a penalty for Carter to choke right in front of the posts - something my mum's cat could put over. Unfortunately the Twickenham crowd have nothing to cheer this time - 3-9 it is.

England now lose James Haskell to the sin bin for elbowing somebody. This is shite from England - how can you field 13 men against New Zealand and expect to get anywhere near parity? Fortunately Carter chokes yet again from pretty much in front of the posts. It stays 3-6 to New Zealand.

England managing to put some things together then just messing it up at the end - that time Toby Flood misses the drop goal by half a pitch length.

England know Dylan Hartley is a yellow card magnet but the guy he's trying to displace, Lee Mears, has just got one for a blatant offside at the ruck. Fortunately Carter does a Toby Flood and chokes the kick.

New Zealand no. 4 very lucky not to get yellow card after some good argy bargy. He's apologising to Tom Rees and then slaps Reesy across face in front of ref - immediately another 10m.

Flood of disaster knocks one over. 3-3.

England players continually being caught and not releasing the ball - running into Kiwis all the time. Here's a kick for Carter - that's how you do it Floody. 3-0 to New Zealand.

First chance to England after Scarlet is caught offside - the first of many let's hope. Unfortunately Flood of disaster is in the chair and he misses.